Our friend is a police officer and was featured in this great video about keeping your kids safe online. He address some great issues that you may find very helpful! It is five minutes long so when you have some time, it is great!
Detective Bird gave a great talk in church yesterday about parenting. I really enjoyed it and thought I would share some thoughts he gave that I really liked. He has quite a perspective being a dad himself and also working in the school and with families with troubled teens.
1. Take care of yourself-if you are not fully functioning then you can't expect to take care of your children.
2. Take Care of the Team
This team is anyone who helps you with your children. For example your neighbors, teachers, scout leaders, grandparents, and especially your spouse.
With your spouse be sure to feed your marriage with regular date night. With teachers and neighbors, counsel together and work together so you can help your children with specific problems they are having.
3. Love your Children--be a provider of good times and good things.
Tell them you love them unconditionally. "I love you if you do awesome things and I love you even when you make mistakes."
4. Discipline your children--Set appropriate limits. Teach responsibility by giving them jobs that you know they can handle. He uses the $5,000 rule to decide if they can handle the job. If you told them you would pay them $5000 for completing the job without your help then they can handle it. Make sure you are clear on what their responsibility is. Then be sure to tell them "If you have any questions Ask". After they succeed be sure to celebrate with them and share in the joy. If they blow it-it's OK. This helps and teaches them. It's better to blow it when the price is small. When you need to discipline give a lot of empathy. I'm so sorry this happened, but his is whats going to happen now. Stay away from the three R's. Rant, Rave and Rescue. Let the consequences teach them and then give them opportunities to try and try again until they get it right.
5. Keep Smiling-Don't nag
It's the don't nag part I have a problem with :(
ReplyDeleteI agree with you Sandra! I keep thinking that if I repeat myself they will get the idea- not so.
ReplyDeleteGreat stuff to work towards, thanks!